Here I sit on the afternoon of Christmas Adam, Randall's family introduced me to that term many years ago.... Anyway, I just ran an errand that was crazy and insane and took way longer than it should have, so now I have declared that we are DONE! The only thing I really have left is to deliver a few goodies and pick up a few gift bags for things that are difficult to wrap but honestly at this point those things will just have to get wrapped somehow because I am done! Did I mention that already? In fact those goodies we made today, just may not even get delivered. Quite the Christmas cheer right? I think that all I want for Christmas is a big fat nap!
Yesterday around here it was 60 something degrees and so I'm not really feeling like it's really December 23rd or anywhere close to that. Having the tree up with all the twinkle lights does help the mood in the evenings but this year for some reason that I can't quite put my finger on, I'm just not feeling it...The Christmas spirit that is. And with that not feeling it comes a guilty feeling, so I am very clearly doing something wrong. I think too that this year I am more aware of so many that are struggling with finances, marriages, health etc. While this knowledge makes me feel even more grateful for how extremely blessed we are, it also makes me wish I could somehow do something to "fix" everybody's stress and anxieties. Maybe that's what Christmas is actually all about...being aware of and praying for those people I know and care about, and knowing that its the same Christ whose birth we are celebrating in just two days, that grew into the man that we worship, and that it's the gift of His atonement that can help us all overcome our weaknesses and deal with those pains and anxieties. Something to think about...
Friday, December 23, 2011
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
The Countdown
I can't believe it. The Holidays are almost here. The fact that we didn't really celebrate Halloween until November 4th, (See this post), makes Thanksgiving that much closer! I can't wait. My parents are coming to be with us for Thanksgiving/Randall's birthday. I think having family makes it so nice. It gives you an excuse to go all out and bake and cook and decorate like crazy. In fact while Randall was away on one of his most recent trips I may or may not have indulged in a little retail therapy at one of my very favorite stores. HOME GOODS! I love that place. If you don't know what that is I would say that it's like a marrying of TJ Maxx and Taipan trading company. I am a sucker for all things glass and there is a huge section right up front with all sorts of dishes and glassware and decorative vases,...and did I mention dishes? Ahh...I love it. And, it's cheap! My table cloth was $8, and I bought 12 new goblets for $12.99, now that's my kind of store. I figured it was only right that I get a more Thanksgiving worthy table cloth, because last year I had to use my white tablecloth, and white dishes on a white table cloth certainly does not "scream" Thanksgiving to me. So I bought a pretty gold-ish table cloth and then some deep purple cloth napkins because I thought that would be pretty and not so blah as gold and orange. Anyway, I have spent a little time on pinterest lately gathering all sorts of new holiday ideas.
It's tradition for Randall and me to make pies the night before thanksgiving, while watching a good movie. Then Thanksgiving morning we usually watch the Macy's day parade as we prepare the other fixins'. Since we don't have cable we won't get the parade, so I'll have to look into watching it on the Internet, because you can't have Thanksgiving without the Macy's parade. Last year we went and watched the parade from Rand's office and it was a dream come true, but it was also exhausting. Seeing it is his birthday on actual Thanksgiving this year, I figured I should make it a little more about him and what he wants to do and not all about me, at least for one day of the year :) We do however think we may go to Central Park the day before where they fill up the balloons and get them ready for the parade the next day. I think that sounds like a lot of fun. We shall see.
When I went on my date to the library I picked up some new recipe books and have been perusing all sorts of yummy things to maybe add to or mix up our Thanksgiving Fare. I am planning on making a Thanksgiving binder with all the recipes that I use on a yearly basis. I know this all sounds ridiculous and shallow but I LOVE Thanksgiving.
I was also trying to think of a way to make the holidays a little more meaningful and spirit filled so I have started reading the New Testament. Our scripture group is studying the New Testament this year and I figured reading and studying about Christ would be nice and I am enjoying it so far.
Last night Randall and I had our planning meeting to discuss our all things Christmas, like budget, activities, what are we doing etc. It got me excited and way overwhelmed too. Sometimes in an attempt to get everything done and organized I overwhelm myself and started to feel panicked. I updated my Address book and finished up our Christmas cards today and really happy with them. The card is just various pictures because I decided that while I would like to think that the people receiving the card want to read about the things going on in our life, and how amazing and talented little Johnny is, in reality xmas cards often comes across of being so over the top or just plain rude! I don't know how many times I've read a Christmas letter and thought to myself things like "wow, compared to them, we are LAME, we don't do any cool stuff like them, or "who really cares that you bought a new house, and car and went on 7 vacations this year? I remember saying to a friend of mine once after receiving her Christmas card one year and feeling really bad comparing my life to hers, "Wow, you guys had such a fun year!" She replied that it had taken her 3 days and a lot of crying to figure out something to say. We all want our lives to see amazing and glamorous but bottom line, is life just life and even if you do have that amazing life, maybe I'm just too insecure to read about it. We on the other hand, have some cute kids in my opinion, and we finally had some great pictures taken(thanks Josh!) and if people want to know the specifics of our life, then there are many ways in which they can look me up so we can chat in real life, not in the crazy xmas card world of "we are so amazing, and better than everybody else." Whew, I feel better now.
It's tradition for Randall and me to make pies the night before thanksgiving, while watching a good movie. Then Thanksgiving morning we usually watch the Macy's day parade as we prepare the other fixins'. Since we don't have cable we won't get the parade, so I'll have to look into watching it on the Internet, because you can't have Thanksgiving without the Macy's parade. Last year we went and watched the parade from Rand's office and it was a dream come true, but it was also exhausting. Seeing it is his birthday on actual Thanksgiving this year, I figured I should make it a little more about him and what he wants to do and not all about me, at least for one day of the year :) We do however think we may go to Central Park the day before where they fill up the balloons and get them ready for the parade the next day. I think that sounds like a lot of fun. We shall see.
When I went on my date to the library I picked up some new recipe books and have been perusing all sorts of yummy things to maybe add to or mix up our Thanksgiving Fare. I am planning on making a Thanksgiving binder with all the recipes that I use on a yearly basis. I know this all sounds ridiculous and shallow but I LOVE Thanksgiving.
I was also trying to think of a way to make the holidays a little more meaningful and spirit filled so I have started reading the New Testament. Our scripture group is studying the New Testament this year and I figured reading and studying about Christ would be nice and I am enjoying it so far.
Last night Randall and I had our planning meeting to discuss our all things Christmas, like budget, activities, what are we doing etc. It got me excited and way overwhelmed too. Sometimes in an attempt to get everything done and organized I overwhelm myself and started to feel panicked. I updated my Address book and finished up our Christmas cards today and really happy with them. The card is just various pictures because I decided that while I would like to think that the people receiving the card want to read about the things going on in our life, and how amazing and talented little Johnny is, in reality xmas cards often comes across of being so over the top or just plain rude! I don't know how many times I've read a Christmas letter and thought to myself things like "wow, compared to them, we are LAME, we don't do any cool stuff like them, or "who really cares that you bought a new house, and car and went on 7 vacations this year? I remember saying to a friend of mine once after receiving her Christmas card one year and feeling really bad comparing my life to hers, "Wow, you guys had such a fun year!" She replied that it had taken her 3 days and a lot of crying to figure out something to say. We all want our lives to see amazing and glamorous but bottom line, is life just life and even if you do have that amazing life, maybe I'm just too insecure to read about it. We on the other hand, have some cute kids in my opinion, and we finally had some great pictures taken(thanks Josh!) and if people want to know the specifics of our life, then there are many ways in which they can look me up so we can chat in real life, not in the crazy xmas card world of "we are so amazing, and better than everybody else." Whew, I feel better now.
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Hallowhat?
Saturday October 29 the forecast predicted a little snow in the late afternoon, so when the first flakes began to fall, I thought nothing of it. In fact, I was a little bit excited. The first snow of the season is always magical, and last year we didn't have any snow until December 26th! The only problem is the little flakes soon turned into big flakes and they just kept coming and coming. Randall and Ethan has been away for the weekend and were supposed to be flying in Saturday night, so when the roads began to be covered with snow I was a little nervous.
Miraculously after two long delays in Atlanta my boys were able to get home about Midnight, thanks to a ride from our trusty home teacher. We had received 6-8 inches of snow over the course of the day and the trees were looking a bit Seuss-like. What I mean by that is that the trees still have all their leaves on and adding heavy wet snow to those branches weighed down all the branches so they were all just bending over like a weeping willow. I noticed some branches breaking off in the road and some power lines came down but I never once thought that this would spell disaster.
Little did I know that about 3pm Saturday many, many and I'm talking millions of people had lost power. Somehow we were fortunate at that point to still have power. In fact Sunday our home teacher called and asked if we could return the favor and let them come over and warm up since they were some without power and their house was already to 55 degrees. We awakened to no power but welcomed them over anyway. It was fun to have their family over since Stake Conference was cancelled due to the weather. We enjoyed a little slower paced day and went to bed. We awakened in the morning we learned that the train lines weren't running due to hundreds of downed trees and many miles of damaged lines. This meant no work for Randall, yeah! Or so I thought. Without power or Internet Randall didn't even have a way to get into his work account to put on his out of office. His boss even asked him to go to an Apple store to try to log in there to do it. Randall's day off turned not so off, with him taking some client calls and the like, but it was still nice to have him home and not work for the most part.
The crazy part is that when we tried to get to the mall we had to try 3 different routes just to get there because of so many closed roads due to downed power lines and trees. I'm not exaggerating when I say that our poor little town looked like it had been hit by a tornado. Oh, and I forgot, Monday was Halloween. Our Mayor (I guess) decided that Halloween would be postponed until Friday November 4th. Can one do that?!? Apparently so. Oh, and did I mention that school of course was cancelled? Day by day I would wait for the call saying whether there would be school the next day or not. By Tuesday the kids were still home, Rand was able to get into work, and the house was cold. Thankfully it was only 55 degrees, which was chilly but not unbearable. The hardest part actually was having the kids keep enough clothes on. I was cold at times with a coat and a hat on. Kate especially was the worst and kept coming out in a skirt and t shirt and I would have to say "NO, long pants and long sleeves and socks or slippers and a coat!
Thankfully I wasn't worried or stressed really at all. I figured it wouldn't be long, because who in this day and age goes without power for an extended period of time? Little did I know. Many people in our ward were without power for 5-6 days! We were prepared with battery powered lanterns, flashlights, and many candles. We did realize quickly though that while we have a stash of "C" batteries, we very much need to stock up on "D" batteries. I was tempted to go trick or treating for batteries. Thankfully due to our location right next to the hospital we were one of the first after a few days to get our power back. Every time I am unhappy with the location of where we live I am reminded of how lucky we have been with our location for various reasons, and power is certainly one of them. We didn't lose power at all with Hurricane Irene and we didn't have any flooding with the snow storm, and on a day to day basis we couldn't be in a more convenient location to the train, library, etc.
The blessing in receiving power days before others was not only warmth, but that we had the opportunity to serve others. I don't write that to toot my own horn but I learned a very important lesson from this experience. Accept help!!! I, like many people, I'm sure due to pride, do not like to accept help. In fact I have a funny story about that. When I was pregnant with Jane I was really sick. I was throwing up all day and feeling horrible and just trying to stay alive. Needless to say the house was a complete wreck. So much so that one of the kids had spilled a ton of raisins all over the family room floor, and I didn't have the energy or the care to just pick them up or even ask them to pick them up. Some friends of mine came by during that time to give me a care basket full of things to help with my nausea and meals and various things to make me feel better. While they were there visiting one of my friends said "let me pick up your raisins" very non chalant, and I practically yelled at her "NO!!!" I was SO embarrassed that they were even there in the first place after who knows how long, and I was NOT going to let her pick them up. A silly thing really but that was so not going to happen. We still laugh about that now, and from time to time I will say "Nicole, let people help you pick up your raisins" and she totally knows what I'm talking about. Another time I was 8 months pregnant and we were moving out of our house and Randall was begging me to let people help me clean once everything was moved out. After much pleading on his part I finally promised him I would get some help. So...after hours and hours of cleaning myself, I went to my neighbor and asked her if she would come vacuum my living room for me so I could tell Randall I had help. I don't say this to say look how awesome I am but I am realizing how dumb that is. People really want to help. I saw needs of people and offered to do things and so many times it was like "no, we don't need to come spend the night, no, you don't need to do my laundry, NO... " I finally realized that it may be uncomfortable to let others see you at your worst, un-showered, dirty laundry etc., but they really want to help. We had the ability and desire to help people and sometimes people let me and sometimes they wouldn't and it just made me sad. While it will still be difficult I've decided that next time I need to let someone "pick up my raisins".
Another thing I learned through all this is how the council we are given from the leaders of our church is so amazing and inspired. Being without power and heat was mostly just an inconvenience. Others not of our faith were not prepared as we were and it was a true difficulty for them. With no prompting from me I was talking to a good friend of mine who is not a member and was without power for 6 days. She and I have discussed many different aspects of the gospel including food storage. She pointed out to me that this was probably one of the reasons why our church leaders ask us to store food. I couldn't believe it and was really excited that she put that together all on her own.
Needless to say by Thursday the kids were still out of school and Halloween had been cancelled at that point. Thankfully the Zoo was having trick or treating so I took the kids over there so they could as least put on their costumes and get some candy. It was a fun time. Wow, who knew the adventures we would have while living here, the good news is I wouldn't trade it for anything.
Miraculously after two long delays in Atlanta my boys were able to get home about Midnight, thanks to a ride from our trusty home teacher. We had received 6-8 inches of snow over the course of the day and the trees were looking a bit Seuss-like. What I mean by that is that the trees still have all their leaves on and adding heavy wet snow to those branches weighed down all the branches so they were all just bending over like a weeping willow. I noticed some branches breaking off in the road and some power lines came down but I never once thought that this would spell disaster.
Little did I know that about 3pm Saturday many, many and I'm talking millions of people had lost power. Somehow we were fortunate at that point to still have power. In fact Sunday our home teacher called and asked if we could return the favor and let them come over and warm up since they were some without power and their house was already to 55 degrees. We awakened to no power but welcomed them over anyway. It was fun to have their family over since Stake Conference was cancelled due to the weather. We enjoyed a little slower paced day and went to bed. We awakened in the morning we learned that the train lines weren't running due to hundreds of downed trees and many miles of damaged lines. This meant no work for Randall, yeah! Or so I thought. Without power or Internet Randall didn't even have a way to get into his work account to put on his out of office. His boss even asked him to go to an Apple store to try to log in there to do it. Randall's day off turned not so off, with him taking some client calls and the like, but it was still nice to have him home and not work for the most part.
The crazy part is that when we tried to get to the mall we had to try 3 different routes just to get there because of so many closed roads due to downed power lines and trees. I'm not exaggerating when I say that our poor little town looked like it had been hit by a tornado. Oh, and I forgot, Monday was Halloween. Our Mayor (I guess) decided that Halloween would be postponed until Friday November 4th. Can one do that?!? Apparently so. Oh, and did I mention that school of course was cancelled? Day by day I would wait for the call saying whether there would be school the next day or not. By Tuesday the kids were still home, Rand was able to get into work, and the house was cold. Thankfully it was only 55 degrees, which was chilly but not unbearable. The hardest part actually was having the kids keep enough clothes on. I was cold at times with a coat and a hat on. Kate especially was the worst and kept coming out in a skirt and t shirt and I would have to say "NO, long pants and long sleeves and socks or slippers and a coat!
Thankfully I wasn't worried or stressed really at all. I figured it wouldn't be long, because who in this day and age goes without power for an extended period of time? Little did I know. Many people in our ward were without power for 5-6 days! We were prepared with battery powered lanterns, flashlights, and many candles. We did realize quickly though that while we have a stash of "C" batteries, we very much need to stock up on "D" batteries. I was tempted to go trick or treating for batteries. Thankfully due to our location right next to the hospital we were one of the first after a few days to get our power back. Every time I am unhappy with the location of where we live I am reminded of how lucky we have been with our location for various reasons, and power is certainly one of them. We didn't lose power at all with Hurricane Irene and we didn't have any flooding with the snow storm, and on a day to day basis we couldn't be in a more convenient location to the train, library, etc.
The blessing in receiving power days before others was not only warmth, but that we had the opportunity to serve others. I don't write that to toot my own horn but I learned a very important lesson from this experience. Accept help!!! I, like many people, I'm sure due to pride, do not like to accept help. In fact I have a funny story about that. When I was pregnant with Jane I was really sick. I was throwing up all day and feeling horrible and just trying to stay alive. Needless to say the house was a complete wreck. So much so that one of the kids had spilled a ton of raisins all over the family room floor, and I didn't have the energy or the care to just pick them up or even ask them to pick them up. Some friends of mine came by during that time to give me a care basket full of things to help with my nausea and meals and various things to make me feel better. While they were there visiting one of my friends said "let me pick up your raisins" very non chalant, and I practically yelled at her "NO!!!" I was SO embarrassed that they were even there in the first place after who knows how long, and I was NOT going to let her pick them up. A silly thing really but that was so not going to happen. We still laugh about that now, and from time to time I will say "Nicole, let people help you pick up your raisins" and she totally knows what I'm talking about. Another time I was 8 months pregnant and we were moving out of our house and Randall was begging me to let people help me clean once everything was moved out. After much pleading on his part I finally promised him I would get some help. So...after hours and hours of cleaning myself, I went to my neighbor and asked her if she would come vacuum my living room for me so I could tell Randall I had help. I don't say this to say look how awesome I am but I am realizing how dumb that is. People really want to help. I saw needs of people and offered to do things and so many times it was like "no, we don't need to come spend the night, no, you don't need to do my laundry, NO... " I finally realized that it may be uncomfortable to let others see you at your worst, un-showered, dirty laundry etc., but they really want to help. We had the ability and desire to help people and sometimes people let me and sometimes they wouldn't and it just made me sad. While it will still be difficult I've decided that next time I need to let someone "pick up my raisins".
Another thing I learned through all this is how the council we are given from the leaders of our church is so amazing and inspired. Being without power and heat was mostly just an inconvenience. Others not of our faith were not prepared as we were and it was a true difficulty for them. With no prompting from me I was talking to a good friend of mine who is not a member and was without power for 6 days. She and I have discussed many different aspects of the gospel including food storage. She pointed out to me that this was probably one of the reasons why our church leaders ask us to store food. I couldn't believe it and was really excited that she put that together all on her own.
Needless to say by Thursday the kids were still out of school and Halloween had been cancelled at that point. Thankfully the Zoo was having trick or treating so I took the kids over there so they could as least put on their costumes and get some candy. It was a fun time. Wow, who knew the adventures we would have while living here, the good news is I wouldn't trade it for anything.
Thursday, October 27, 2011
A Date with Me
Last night I took I had the chance to a little "Me" time. In fact a friend of mine asked what I was doing and even offered to watch the kids so Randall and I could go out but I said "No thanks". Sometimes a girl just needs to be on her own.
Rand's been gone a lot lot with work and then an unexpected family death so this alone time was "timely". The funny thing is when I finally have this opportunity I stress out about what I'm going to do? I often feel like I don't know what I like anymore or go window shopping only getting myself down about clothing I don't want to buy because it isn't the size I want to wear (which I know is stupid and I'm trying to get over that) and then feeling like in a few hours I'm supposed to "find myself", and come home completely rejuvenated. Only it doesn't happen that way, and how could it in a mere few hours?
Rand is brilliant though and asked why I didn't just go to the library? I think the thought of having the time to do anything I want and going to the library seems rather lame and implies that I'm boring. The thing is we all know I'm not boring, so well, I went to the library. I LOVE the library. I spent hours there and could have spent my whole time there if my meter wasn't going to run out of money. Instead of just feeding the meter I decided to just move on to my next destination...Barnes and noble. Sensing a theme here? But first why I loved the library. For the first time in forever I had time to read through books that I wanted to read. I made a huge pile of the ones that sounded interesting and then sat down and looked a little closer to decide the ones I wanted to take home. The library I found is a really good way to see what interests me by just walking down the subject isle and seeing what subject makes me want to walk down that row and peruse. What to know what my interest are? Home decor, photography, organization, holidays, art history( a new thing for me that I would really like to spend some time studying), music, entertaining, cooking. Nothing too earth shattering or deep but it was exciting just the same. I wish I could say it was something nifty but it is what it is and frankly it's refreshing to choose what I really like instead of what sounds impressive or what others might like. I came home with two book to just read, and a slew of others with recipes for Thanksgiving and tradition and and holidays ideas. I'm so excited. Oh, and as a guilty pleasure I checked out a season of project runway. Don't judge me. I love seeing how creative people are and how they can be given a task and make something amazing and imaginative with just fabric, and often times not just fabric but say only items you can find in a grocery store. Randall would rather die than watch something like that, and I told him now he knows how I feel about Planet earth, there I said it. I know everybody thinks it's amazing, and it is amazing but if you've seen it once, or even part of it been there done that.
Anyway, after the library I was starving so I decided I wanted something not quite fast foodish but not sit down either. I once went to dinner by myself years ago at a sit down restaurant. While I felt comfortable doing it the people around me and their stares and reactions bothered me to where I haven't done that since. Although I think living here and getting used to people stares and reactions I wouldn't think twice about it. I ended up at a place called Panera Bread wanting a salad or something. I ended up with a half salad half panini option and frankly was disappointed big time in the sandwich and the salad was OK, and for $12! When the person rang it up she even said "it may seem pricey but that's because these are high quality signature items". I may end up at Wendy's next time because their salad is cheaper and WAY better.
After my awesome dinner I went to Barnes and Noble, another favorite. I could spend hours perusing the bargain areas, as well as the magazines, and children's books. I bought a darling children's book about the true story of the man who made the balloons that were initially large puppets for the Macy's day parade. It is so fun and cute and will be kept on my shelves so it won't be ruined. I really hate stuff, but love books. I also bought a little bargain book something along the lines what every Dad should know about daughters and Mothers about sons. It has a religious take on it too and I thought for $5 it couldn't hurt. My relationship with Ethan goes very up and down where I adore him and compliment him and we feel close, and then other times where he never meets my expectations and seems to never be focused etc. so I thought it might have some good tips. One quick section I read was that if Mothers compliment their sons on the good things, you will see more of those good things. Something I need to work on. Ethan is such an amazing boy and I need to just look past his funny ways. Like the fact that he can't wear any piece of clothing even if it has the tiniest hole that you can't even see unless you stretch the fabric. This is especially true with socks, in fact this morning he told me he couldn't wear that sock because it was getting "thin". Also as we were getting ready to leave for the airport today I asked him where his jacket was and he said he hasn't know for days. Wish he would have told me that days ago when we weren't walking out the door. He also can't set the table while talking because he can't focus on more than one item at a time. I'm starting to think this is a boy thing. He gets excited about what he's talking about and has to be told each thing to set over and over until 30 minutes later we are almost there :) He does really well in school thankfully so somethings working.
After the book store I went over to Short Hills Mall. This place makes me feel crazy. It has every store imaginable and all very high end and so it is fun to walk through some of my favs like Crate and Barrel and Pottery barn, and Anthropolgie, but leaves me feeling often empty and selfish and greedy thinking, it really isn't good. I had to pick something up and that's why I went but really it was my least favorite stop.
At the end even though I wasn't really hungry true to myself I figured I might regret it if I didn't have some treat of some kind before the night was over. I had heard recently of someone getting a slice of pumpkin cheesecake at The Cheesecake factory and while I'm NOT a cheesecake fun it sounded so good and "Fally". I figured Rand might think that a nice treat so I brought a slice home to share. Sadly when I got home he was still on a client call with Australia until late so I ate my half not waiting for him to get off his call.
It was a nice night but mostly because I finally did things that are truly "me". Don't take my word for it but I think I make a pretty great date.
Rand's been gone a lot lot with work and then an unexpected family death so this alone time was "timely". The funny thing is when I finally have this opportunity I stress out about what I'm going to do? I often feel like I don't know what I like anymore or go window shopping only getting myself down about clothing I don't want to buy because it isn't the size I want to wear (which I know is stupid and I'm trying to get over that) and then feeling like in a few hours I'm supposed to "find myself", and come home completely rejuvenated. Only it doesn't happen that way, and how could it in a mere few hours?
Rand is brilliant though and asked why I didn't just go to the library? I think the thought of having the time to do anything I want and going to the library seems rather lame and implies that I'm boring. The thing is we all know I'm not boring, so well, I went to the library. I LOVE the library. I spent hours there and could have spent my whole time there if my meter wasn't going to run out of money. Instead of just feeding the meter I decided to just move on to my next destination...Barnes and noble. Sensing a theme here? But first why I loved the library. For the first time in forever I had time to read through books that I wanted to read. I made a huge pile of the ones that sounded interesting and then sat down and looked a little closer to decide the ones I wanted to take home. The library I found is a really good way to see what interests me by just walking down the subject isle and seeing what subject makes me want to walk down that row and peruse. What to know what my interest are? Home decor, photography, organization, holidays, art history( a new thing for me that I would really like to spend some time studying), music, entertaining, cooking. Nothing too earth shattering or deep but it was exciting just the same. I wish I could say it was something nifty but it is what it is and frankly it's refreshing to choose what I really like instead of what sounds impressive or what others might like. I came home with two book to just read, and a slew of others with recipes for Thanksgiving and tradition and and holidays ideas. I'm so excited. Oh, and as a guilty pleasure I checked out a season of project runway. Don't judge me. I love seeing how creative people are and how they can be given a task and make something amazing and imaginative with just fabric, and often times not just fabric but say only items you can find in a grocery store. Randall would rather die than watch something like that, and I told him now he knows how I feel about Planet earth, there I said it. I know everybody thinks it's amazing, and it is amazing but if you've seen it once, or even part of it been there done that.
Anyway, after the library I was starving so I decided I wanted something not quite fast foodish but not sit down either. I once went to dinner by myself years ago at a sit down restaurant. While I felt comfortable doing it the people around me and their stares and reactions bothered me to where I haven't done that since. Although I think living here and getting used to people stares and reactions I wouldn't think twice about it. I ended up at a place called Panera Bread wanting a salad or something. I ended up with a half salad half panini option and frankly was disappointed big time in the sandwich and the salad was OK, and for $12! When the person rang it up she even said "it may seem pricey but that's because these are high quality signature items". I may end up at Wendy's next time because their salad is cheaper and WAY better.
After my awesome dinner I went to Barnes and Noble, another favorite. I could spend hours perusing the bargain areas, as well as the magazines, and children's books. I bought a darling children's book about the true story of the man who made the balloons that were initially large puppets for the Macy's day parade. It is so fun and cute and will be kept on my shelves so it won't be ruined. I really hate stuff, but love books. I also bought a little bargain book something along the lines what every Dad should know about daughters and Mothers about sons. It has a religious take on it too and I thought for $5 it couldn't hurt. My relationship with Ethan goes very up and down where I adore him and compliment him and we feel close, and then other times where he never meets my expectations and seems to never be focused etc. so I thought it might have some good tips. One quick section I read was that if Mothers compliment their sons on the good things, you will see more of those good things. Something I need to work on. Ethan is such an amazing boy and I need to just look past his funny ways. Like the fact that he can't wear any piece of clothing even if it has the tiniest hole that you can't even see unless you stretch the fabric. This is especially true with socks, in fact this morning he told me he couldn't wear that sock because it was getting "thin". Also as we were getting ready to leave for the airport today I asked him where his jacket was and he said he hasn't know for days. Wish he would have told me that days ago when we weren't walking out the door. He also can't set the table while talking because he can't focus on more than one item at a time. I'm starting to think this is a boy thing. He gets excited about what he's talking about and has to be told each thing to set over and over until 30 minutes later we are almost there :) He does really well in school thankfully so somethings working.
After the book store I went over to Short Hills Mall. This place makes me feel crazy. It has every store imaginable and all very high end and so it is fun to walk through some of my favs like Crate and Barrel and Pottery barn, and Anthropolgie, but leaves me feeling often empty and selfish and greedy thinking, it really isn't good. I had to pick something up and that's why I went but really it was my least favorite stop.
At the end even though I wasn't really hungry true to myself I figured I might regret it if I didn't have some treat of some kind before the night was over. I had heard recently of someone getting a slice of pumpkin cheesecake at The Cheesecake factory and while I'm NOT a cheesecake fun it sounded so good and "Fally". I figured Rand might think that a nice treat so I brought a slice home to share. Sadly when I got home he was still on a client call with Australia until late so I ate my half not waiting for him to get off his call.
It was a nice night but mostly because I finally did things that are truly "me". Don't take my word for it but I think I make a pretty great date.
Thursday, September 29, 2011
A Jersey Day
Oh boy what a difference a day makes. Just the other night Randall and I were having a very serious discussion about whether we would consider staying here forever. The concenses was that we really would if it weren't for just one teensy little thing like the cost of a home around here, oh and then the taxes on top of that. Anyway, we were happily discussing all the little things that we love about living here and how much even the things that we found difficult in the beginning are now just quite "normal".
But then today I had what I very lovingly refer to as "A Jersey Day". I'm just minding my own business and suddenly I found myself almost face to face with a very upset and very rude woman in a parking lot that left me almost in tears after the little altercation. I just can't believe how quickly people can be so rude. And then it just seems to be in my cards that the rest of the day I continued to have these little "Jersey" incidents. I even called Randall trying to catch him before he was on his plane today completely upset saying "Let's move to Georgia, I hate New Jersey."
Randall called from the airport early this evening to tell me he had bought me a gift. He said I had to guess what it was and since he was on a layover in Detroit I guessed almost immediately that he had bought me a new University of Michigan sweatshirt, since I had finally gotten rid of mine that I've had since my college days oh just 10 years ago. I was so excited. He just walked in the door and handed it to me to try on, and to add insult to injury... it's too small! I think it's time for bed. Tomorrow is another day...in Jersey.
But then today I had what I very lovingly refer to as "A Jersey Day". I'm just minding my own business and suddenly I found myself almost face to face with a very upset and very rude woman in a parking lot that left me almost in tears after the little altercation. I just can't believe how quickly people can be so rude. And then it just seems to be in my cards that the rest of the day I continued to have these little "Jersey" incidents. I even called Randall trying to catch him before he was on his plane today completely upset saying "Let's move to Georgia, I hate New Jersey."
Randall called from the airport early this evening to tell me he had bought me a gift. He said I had to guess what it was and since he was on a layover in Detroit I guessed almost immediately that he had bought me a new University of Michigan sweatshirt, since I had finally gotten rid of mine that I've had since my college days oh just 10 years ago. I was so excited. He just walked in the door and handed it to me to try on, and to add insult to injury... it's too small! I think it's time for bed. Tomorrow is another day...in Jersey.
Shirts vs Skins
The other night Ethan was getting ready for soccer practice when he turns to me and says "Mom, I sure hope they do shirts and skins tonight, and I hope I get to be skins." Of course somewhat giggling I ask him, "Why?" "Cause it makes me feel so tough!"
Thanks Ethan, I needed that.
Thanks Ethan, I needed that.
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
I admit it, I was wrong
When Summer was coming to a close, all my friends were so sad to sad goodbye to lazy days and the craziness of Summer. I kept thinking, "what are they talking about, this summer has been non stop crazy!" But, then school started, and my kids are older this year, and boy what a difference a year makes. We have more activities, more homework, more errands, and more drop offs. I feel a bit crazy. So I admit it, I was wrong, the school year is crazy!
The first week I prided myself on the well oiled machine we had running around here. I would awaken before all the kids and shower and be ready when they awakened so we could have a good breakfast and not be rushed to get out the door. I walked the kids to school and and back each day. While the kids were away I did laundry and cleaned house and it stayed done for awhile and I loved it. Dinner was done everyday by 3pm and I felt like "I totally got this." Then I don't know what happend but somehow the Leave it to Beaver days are over and while things aren't totally out of control I just feel like I am constantly running, and my laundry gets done and folded but not put away, or dinner gets left to the last minutes during the hardest hour of the day when Jane wants attention, and the kids needs help with homework or practicing and I just want to scream, and scream I have.
I also pride myself on the fact that I am NOT a yeller. But the last week I'm ashamed to say that there has been quite a bit of yelling. There probably would have been more yelling except for the fact that we share a wall with our neighbors and that does inhibit me somewhat, thank heavens :) I think part of this sudden craziness is that the kids are tired and adjusting to all the busyness themselves, which means there is a lot more crying on they're part and more tantrums and me getting impatient. I have consumed more M&M's in the last week than probably over my lifetime (ok, so that was a bit of an exaggeration, but only a bit)
I'm hoping things settle down and I am doing my best to say "No" to certain things like when the PTO comes calling for help or Anna wants to join "The daisies" girl scout troop. I did sign up to do a few crafts for holidays at the kids school so I think that's plenty for now.
Anyway, I am just feeling a bit ornery and sadly this is my update. I am so far behind in all that I need and want to post but it is what it is and one of these days I will get to it. But not for now, and that's okay.
The first week I prided myself on the well oiled machine we had running around here. I would awaken before all the kids and shower and be ready when they awakened so we could have a good breakfast and not be rushed to get out the door. I walked the kids to school and and back each day. While the kids were away I did laundry and cleaned house and it stayed done for awhile and I loved it. Dinner was done everyday by 3pm and I felt like "I totally got this." Then I don't know what happend but somehow the Leave it to Beaver days are over and while things aren't totally out of control I just feel like I am constantly running, and my laundry gets done and folded but not put away, or dinner gets left to the last minutes during the hardest hour of the day when Jane wants attention, and the kids needs help with homework or practicing and I just want to scream, and scream I have.
I also pride myself on the fact that I am NOT a yeller. But the last week I'm ashamed to say that there has been quite a bit of yelling. There probably would have been more yelling except for the fact that we share a wall with our neighbors and that does inhibit me somewhat, thank heavens :) I think part of this sudden craziness is that the kids are tired and adjusting to all the busyness themselves, which means there is a lot more crying on they're part and more tantrums and me getting impatient. I have consumed more M&M's in the last week than probably over my lifetime (ok, so that was a bit of an exaggeration, but only a bit)
I'm hoping things settle down and I am doing my best to say "No" to certain things like when the PTO comes calling for help or Anna wants to join "The daisies" girl scout troop. I did sign up to do a few crafts for holidays at the kids school so I think that's plenty for now.
Anyway, I am just feeling a bit ornery and sadly this is my update. I am so far behind in all that I need and want to post but it is what it is and one of these days I will get to it. But not for now, and that's okay.
Sunday, September 4, 2011
It's Coming...School time that is
I'm overwhelmed with different emotions as the kids prepare to start school in just 3 days...gasp. While there were a few days last week that I couldn't wait for that day to come, now it's practically here and I can hardly believe it. We have had a great summer filled with many fun and busy things. The time has literally passed faster than I ever could have imagined. Last summer was the LONGEST summer of my life. It probably had something to do with the fact that we had just moved here, I had a brand new baby, we didn't join the local pool, and I didn't know anybody or anywhere to go, AND we had almost an extra month of summer since Utah gets out of school so early and they start so late here. This year however there was always something to do or see or someone here visiting us. I have a list of things that we did that I want to blog about, and yet don't even know when I will get the time to sit down to unload my camera full of pictures.
Things are are only going to continue to be busy. Ethan will have soccer on Tuesday and Saturdays, Anna gymnastics on Thursdays, Ethan and Anna both have piano on Wednesdays and all sort of meetings and baby showers and RS activities all of which I'm in charge of to keep us going full stream ahead.
I'm looking forward to some time to de-junk from all the summer accumulation, deep clean, and get organized. The thing I am excited for the most is having things once cleaned to actually stay that way without 4 kids and their whirlwind to mess it up the second it's been completed. Although I have to say that Kate is our biggest mess maker as of late. She is very into building forts and "traps", using anything she can find to basically make just a huge pile of junk. Then of course when she is asked to clean it up, she replies "I'm too young, or it's too heavy" or a smattering of other excuses. Oh, and I already forgot that Kate will start school too on Friday. She will go to school 3 mornings a week. I think she's ready and will love it and I'm sure once she starts I will love the time I have with just Jane to get things done. The thought of leaving her for those hours a week right now makes me a wee bit sick. Not in a I don't think this is a right kind of way, but a how is it possible that she is 4 and going to school? Next year she will start Kindergarten and go ALL DAY! That thought almost breaks my heart and yet I think she will do fine and enjoy it. Included in her preschool is an activity each day. Monday she does dance, Tuesday she has a swimming lesson, and Friday she has gym and fitness. I'm anxious to see how she takes to all of these new experiences. I think she will be one tired cookie come night time.
This time of year is also one of the busiest with my calling. I am over the activities in Relief Society as well as the 6 weekly groups that we have. I have great group leaders but I kind of have to get everything organized and up and running. We also have a RS quarterly activity next week and I only have 1 committee member and she was just called to be the VT coordinator so is busy herself so basically the activity is all on me. It's all good and it's nothing too hard it just adds to my now already full plate. The good news is I'm learning to lower my expectations and to delegate. Our ward is great and people are always willing to help if you just ask. I'm just trying to keep this all in mind as I go to back to school and don't accidentally over commit myself to helping in my kids classrooms. There's a time and a season right?
I'm anxious for this next phase and hope it's a smooth transition. Randall gave all the kids and myself our "Back to school" blessings this afternoon and that was nice. I don't think the kids realize what a big deal that is. We tried to help them understand what a blessing it is that they have a Father in the home that not only loves them, but holds and is worthy to use his Priesthood to bless them whenever then need. I still remember receiving a father's blessing before school each year and think it is a very sweet and important tradition. We'll see how the week goes. Wish us luck!
Things are are only going to continue to be busy. Ethan will have soccer on Tuesday and Saturdays, Anna gymnastics on Thursdays, Ethan and Anna both have piano on Wednesdays and all sort of meetings and baby showers and RS activities all of which I'm in charge of to keep us going full stream ahead.
I'm looking forward to some time to de-junk from all the summer accumulation, deep clean, and get organized. The thing I am excited for the most is having things once cleaned to actually stay that way without 4 kids and their whirlwind to mess it up the second it's been completed. Although I have to say that Kate is our biggest mess maker as of late. She is very into building forts and "traps", using anything she can find to basically make just a huge pile of junk. Then of course when she is asked to clean it up, she replies "I'm too young, or it's too heavy" or a smattering of other excuses. Oh, and I already forgot that Kate will start school too on Friday. She will go to school 3 mornings a week. I think she's ready and will love it and I'm sure once she starts I will love the time I have with just Jane to get things done. The thought of leaving her for those hours a week right now makes me a wee bit sick. Not in a I don't think this is a right kind of way, but a how is it possible that she is 4 and going to school? Next year she will start Kindergarten and go ALL DAY! That thought almost breaks my heart and yet I think she will do fine and enjoy it. Included in her preschool is an activity each day. Monday she does dance, Tuesday she has a swimming lesson, and Friday she has gym and fitness. I'm anxious to see how she takes to all of these new experiences. I think she will be one tired cookie come night time.
This time of year is also one of the busiest with my calling. I am over the activities in Relief Society as well as the 6 weekly groups that we have. I have great group leaders but I kind of have to get everything organized and up and running. We also have a RS quarterly activity next week and I only have 1 committee member and she was just called to be the VT coordinator so is busy herself so basically the activity is all on me. It's all good and it's nothing too hard it just adds to my now already full plate. The good news is I'm learning to lower my expectations and to delegate. Our ward is great and people are always willing to help if you just ask. I'm just trying to keep this all in mind as I go to back to school and don't accidentally over commit myself to helping in my kids classrooms. There's a time and a season right?
I'm anxious for this next phase and hope it's a smooth transition. Randall gave all the kids and myself our "Back to school" blessings this afternoon and that was nice. I don't think the kids realize what a big deal that is. We tried to help them understand what a blessing it is that they have a Father in the home that not only loves them, but holds and is worthy to use his Priesthood to bless them whenever then need. I still remember receiving a father's blessing before school each year and think it is a very sweet and important tradition. We'll see how the week goes. Wish us luck!
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
33 and UB40
Today I turned 33. It was a good day, basically because I had fairly low expectations. That may sound bad, and it's not because my family does a poor job of making me feel special but I've found the advice I received a few years ago about having low expectations in regard to holidays was some of the best advice I've ever received. Do I always follow this adivce? No, but when I do, it makes me and my family I'm afraid much, much happier.
Let me explain. In my head I want every holiday, birthday, anniversary to be amazing, wonderful and overflowing with a lifetime of memories. The reality is that most days are just typical and that's OK. Today for instance was a good day. Randall got up and made me a special breakfast and when I was cleaning bathrooms after breakfast he scolded me and told me to stop that, and that he would finish cleaning the bathrooms. I received some nice gifts and although none of them were surprises, that's OK. That way I know they are things I really want. After breakfast I somewhat lazily got ready and then I took Anna and Kate for their annual eye exams so they would be ready for school if they needed changes. That, and Anna's glasses were recently run over or something so we had no choice but buy new. Anyway, 2 and a half hours later we were done at the Dr. Then we came home, made lunch and got Jane down for a nap. Then I drove Anna out to a target optical to get her fit for glasses. By the time we got home I was able to have a little down time and then I went and picked up a sitter so Rand and I and some friends could go to dinner.
We went to Cheesecake Factory and it was yummy! We usually like to eat ethnic and at non chain restaurants, but I was just in the mood for something you just know you're going to love, and we did. I got the Bang Bang chicken and shrimp in a Thai coconut curry sauce and hello it was delish. Then just to top things off I ordered a layered chocolate cake and Randall got a slice of Godiva chocolate cheesecake and both were to die for. Cant you tell we like chocolate? I felt sick after all was said and done and I didn't even eat half of the slice of cake. I have to admit that every once in a while I'm a strong believer in eating until you just don't want to see another dessert for a month. In fact during dinner a friend texted saying to leave room for dessert tomorrow night and it made me sick. I told her I'd rather talk a walk through Home Goods :) I think I'm desserted out for awhile and that's saying something.
So my day was good. I had several calls and texts and face-book birthday wishes. Was it over the top exciting and fantastic? Not really but that's OK. I feel loved and celebrated and that's what matters. I have to admit, that one of the highlights of my day was on the way home from dropping off the baby sitter. It has been an absolutely beautiful last two days. Temperatures in the 70's and crisp and cool in the evening and mornings. We even slept with our windows open last night and had to use a blanket and it was fantastic. I can just smell Fall around the corner and that makes me giddy. So, as I drove home I put down all the windows and turned on the radio and low and behold the song "Wise men say, only fool rush in" by UB40 came on, and I was was immediately taken back to the good old high school days of stag dances. Now you can make fun all you want, but I cranked the music up super loud, and drove around town until the song ended singing at the top of my lungs. It felt so good and boy did I feel young again. Not a bad day in my book, not bad at all.
Let me explain. In my head I want every holiday, birthday, anniversary to be amazing, wonderful and overflowing with a lifetime of memories. The reality is that most days are just typical and that's OK. Today for instance was a good day. Randall got up and made me a special breakfast and when I was cleaning bathrooms after breakfast he scolded me and told me to stop that, and that he would finish cleaning the bathrooms. I received some nice gifts and although none of them were surprises, that's OK. That way I know they are things I really want. After breakfast I somewhat lazily got ready and then I took Anna and Kate for their annual eye exams so they would be ready for school if they needed changes. That, and Anna's glasses were recently run over or something so we had no choice but buy new. Anyway, 2 and a half hours later we were done at the Dr. Then we came home, made lunch and got Jane down for a nap. Then I drove Anna out to a target optical to get her fit for glasses. By the time we got home I was able to have a little down time and then I went and picked up a sitter so Rand and I and some friends could go to dinner.
We went to Cheesecake Factory and it was yummy! We usually like to eat ethnic and at non chain restaurants, but I was just in the mood for something you just know you're going to love, and we did. I got the Bang Bang chicken and shrimp in a Thai coconut curry sauce and hello it was delish. Then just to top things off I ordered a layered chocolate cake and Randall got a slice of Godiva chocolate cheesecake and both were to die for. Cant you tell we like chocolate? I felt sick after all was said and done and I didn't even eat half of the slice of cake. I have to admit that every once in a while I'm a strong believer in eating until you just don't want to see another dessert for a month. In fact during dinner a friend texted saying to leave room for dessert tomorrow night and it made me sick. I told her I'd rather talk a walk through Home Goods :) I think I'm desserted out for awhile and that's saying something.
So my day was good. I had several calls and texts and face-book birthday wishes. Was it over the top exciting and fantastic? Not really but that's OK. I feel loved and celebrated and that's what matters. I have to admit, that one of the highlights of my day was on the way home from dropping off the baby sitter. It has been an absolutely beautiful last two days. Temperatures in the 70's and crisp and cool in the evening and mornings. We even slept with our windows open last night and had to use a blanket and it was fantastic. I can just smell Fall around the corner and that makes me giddy. So, as I drove home I put down all the windows and turned on the radio and low and behold the song "Wise men say, only fool rush in" by UB40 came on, and I was was immediately taken back to the good old high school days of stag dances. Now you can make fun all you want, but I cranked the music up super loud, and drove around town until the song ended singing at the top of my lungs. It felt so good and boy did I feel young again. Not a bad day in my book, not bad at all.
Saturday, August 20, 2011
4 Years Ago
As I sat wrapping presents for our Kate's 4th birthday tomorrow, I couldn't help but think back to the time of her birth. While I know that reminiscing about a child's birth is a common thing for any mother around their birthday, the memories of Kate's birth are especially poignant.
It was a VERY difficult time for us. It all started 5 and a half years ago.... Randall had just finished graduate school in Arizona and we moved to a nice town-home in Utah, with high hopes of starting up a successful business. Randall and a friend from grad school had won a competition for entrepreneurs and we were gung ho about starting this new venture. He had funding for this project and people that mattered were telling us how successful this venture was going to be. Quite honestly we kind of thought that in a short period of time we would be building our dream home on a hill, making TONS of money and all would be perfect. What we didn't know in our naivete and inexperience is that a lot of people starting a business, even if it is a fantastic idea, aren't always successful. A little over a year later the economy started to take a dive and while things were going along relatively well with the business, our investors no longer wanted to invest. With very short notice we were left without a job or health insurance and I was then 8 months pregnant with Kate.
Needless to say it was a very scary and emotional time. Any pregnant woman is allowed an abundance of emotion but I now was pregnant and didn't even know what home I was going to bring our little baby home to. Let me back up a minute. About a month before all this, when we thought things were going along great, we had even been given the offer to buy our town home and thought that we probably would. We had grown to love the area and I had made some of my very best friends. Things were going along well. Now without a job not only could we not afford to buy the home we were currently living in, but the owner of the home suddenly decided that they needed to move in, and we needed to move out. You can imagine our panic. Randall began interviewing for jobs immediately but as is often the case he was either overqualified, or lacked enough experience depending on the job. This is often the case with job seekers and makes me crazy. Anyway, Randall had a company fly him out to Virginia all expenses paid to interview. The interview went extremely well and they basically gave him a verbal offer and so we decided the best decision would be to move in with my parents, have the baby and wait until the offer came and we could move to Virginia and all would be well.
Weeks later we were moved in with my parents and the official offer never came. We were baffled to say the least. They had even asked Randall if he wanted them to set him up with a Realtor, and thankfully he had declined. He was interviewing for anything he possibly could get. Every single interview would go very well and we kept hoping that any moment he would have a great job. All the while we kept praying that Randall would be directed to a job that we would enjoy and excel at. He even worked at a job selling organic food and freezers in the afternoons and evenings. Yes, with an MBA from an excellent and expensive school, I might add this is what he was his job. Was this humbling? Oh ya. He was miserable as you can imagine. We barely made enough money to pay our 780$ cobra payment so I could be insured when the baby came. Thankfully that job was very short lived.
This time was a blur and due to my physical and emotional state I don't remember all the details exactly but it was about a week after we moved in with my parents that my Mom found out her ovarian cancer had come back and that she needed to have major surgery and begin chemotherapy...again. My Mom was initially diagnosed with ovarian cancer when we were in grad school when Anna was a new baby. This news was shocking as you can imagine and it at least put our challenges into perspective for us. Another week passed and I was still a week out from my due date, but since my Mom needed to have surgery ASAP we convinced my OB who is a family friend to induce me so I could have the baby and get on my feet so I could help my Mom recover from her surgery. What a crazy time it was.
I have been induced with all my babies so this was nothing new to me. I went to the hospital early and after an excruciating and non planned natural birth, our sweet Katherine Elise was born, and she was beautiful and perfect. We brought her "home"(to my parents house) from the hospital on my 29th birthday. While you can't ask for a better gift it wasn't exactly my best birthday. With the joy of this new beautiful baby we still didn't have a good job, and knew that in the next 10 days or so my Mom would be facing a very difficult surgery and recovery.
The time came and my Mom had her surgery and came home shortly after and I was there to help care for her and cook and do all the household things. Thankfully I felt good very quickly after my delivery and my parents ward and my sisters in law were also very helpful. Here is where things become a little more tricky. A week or so after my Mom's surgery my Dad had a routine check for his heart and they found a blockage. Now sadly this is nothing new for us. My Dad's heart is not good and this was only one of many episodes. His health history alone would take 3 extra paragraphs. (love you dad!) So...My Dad went in for his "routine" procedure to have a stent placed in the valve that should have been same day surgery, but with my Dad nothing is ever "same day". It usually involves weeks and several near death experiences.
After Dad's "procedure" he started having pain and some problems that they couldn't explain. After several days with still more pain and complication, he had a heart attack. The heart attack then progressed to where plaque from his heart broke off and went up into his brain causing a stroke. Now, this was all very concerning and traumatic for all of us. But...this same thing had happened when I was pregnant with Anna. We were packing up house to move from Texas to Arizona to start grad school when I got a call from my Mom saying that my Dad had another heart attack, yes I said another heart attack. See? I wasn't exaggerating about these "episodes". I of course jumped on a plane and came home. It was then that he had his first stroke. I digress. So now we are living with my parents, my Mom has just come home from the hospital after having major surgery, and my Dad is now in the hospital in intensive care, and I have a 3 week old baby and am trying to keep it all together. Again, not to say that we didn't have family and ward members, but I do not exaggerate when I say that I would nurse Kate, then drive my Mom to the hospital, and push her in a wheel chair up to visit my Dad. Good times.
The good news is miracles happened with my Dad as they have too many times to count. At the time we weren't sure if he would ever come home at all, or at the very least in a "normal" state. He did recover fully and returned home a few weeks later. It was a very scary time with two invalids to care for and trying to stay a float with very little money coming in and Randall still interviewing like crazy with no better job in site.
It was during all of this that Randall began working for another company. This company was struggling and not well known...but he was offered a job and he felt very strongly that he should take the position. The pay was bad, the job not great, but again he really felt like he should take it...so he did. He learned a LOT and it turned out to be the exact job he needed to learn the skills and gain the experience he would need in the future.
Three months later we were able to move out of my parents house. Both of my parents health was stable, and Randall started a new job with Omniture, now Adobe where he is currently working. If he had not taken that job with the struggling company, making very little money he would not have been offered his current job. Even though it didn't make any logical sense at the time to take that job, if he hadn't taken it, we don't know where we would be today.
Looking back at 4 years ago today I feel many different emotions. During that time I was stressed and struggling. I was thinking: Why us? We are good people. We got a great education, we work hard, we pay our tithing, we serve in the church, I just don't get it. But now I look back and the only thing I feel is an immense sense of humility and gratitude. Our path was laid out before us and I know Heavenly Father had a very specific plan for us. I know that we needed to be with my parents exactly when we were to help them, and they helped us. We would not have been able to make it on our own financially . The job Randall felt strongly about was the exact stepping stone we needed to move on to the next step. It was the exact answer to a very specific prayer. Randall still says he never would have known how much he would enjoy doing what he does, and what a great match for his skill set it would be. If someone would have told me 4 years ago where we would be today, in any regard, I would not have believed one word of it.
I don't know why I needed to write all this tonight but I just felt like I had to recognize and remember how incredibly blessed we have been over the last few years, even then, though we weren't exactly aware of it. It wasn't easy, in fact a lot of it was still filled with struggles, but looking back and having everything fall exactly into place is amazing to me.
Our Kate is a huge part of that. She was an unexpected but pleasant surprise and the reason I write that is because we were at an unsure time in our lives and things with Rand's business were not exactly stable. We weren't sure were we would be a year from then, and our other children were making us feel like we had our hands full. When I look back now, I see what a blessing it was that she came exactly when she did. She was a beautiful and sweet, perfect little person that came when we needed her. We needed her to bring us joy in an other wise difficult time. I think it was healing for both of my parents to hold her as a sleeping newborn and feel her sweet, calm little spirit. She still remains to be nothing but sunshine to us. No matter where we go people are completely drawn to her. She honestly has something about her. We are so grateful that she came to our family. Not a day goes by that she doesn't tell me at least 10 times "Mom, I love you" and reaches up for a kiss on the lips. She melts my heart and I'm so glad that we get to celebrate her birth 4 years ago in the morning.
Sunday, August 14, 2011
It's Birthday Season
Birthday season for us is the end of August. It all starts next Sunday the 21st with Kate, then two days later it's me, then 7 days later it's Ethan. Yes, that's 3 birthdays within 9 days. That makes for one very busy, and expensive month! If the kids would have been born on their due dates we would have had all 3 birthdays within 5 days, so I guess I'll count my blessings. Needless to say by the time September rolls around we are all caked out.( if you click on the pictures you can see the them all bigger and better )
We have decided in our family to do a "friend" party every other year. Last year was supposed to be the year of the friend party but with a new baby, a cross country move, and not knowing anybody here we didn't do that. So... it's been 3 years since Ethan had a party so we figured it was about time to do it up right.
Ethan is very into Harry Potter these, days not unlike a lot of people. He is currently nearly the end of book #4 and loving all of them. I can't even count how many times he has checked out the HP movies from the library this season.( Just through 3, we told he has to wait until he's older to see the others, which he thinks is SO unfair) We thought that given his love of all things Harry Potter it was only fitting to throw him a Harry Potter birthday party. Thanks to my new obsession, pinterest, I've gathered some great ideas and we started things off this weekend with his invitations.
see exhibit A:
I originally wanted to just make a scroll for his invite and tie it to an "owl" but Ethan informed me that Harry in fact received letters to Hogwarts, NOT a scroll...my bad.
Here is the invitation itself. We were going for an old "Maurader's Map" type thing. I think they turned out really well. Below is what the invite actually says:
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry
26a Walnut Street, Summit NJ 07901
Reagan Hymas Closet Under the Attic, Second Floor 344 Park Ave., Berkeley Heights , NJ
Dear Sir,
We are pleased to accept you to the Hogwarts School of Wizardry. A special
term will be held on Saturday, August 27, 2011 in celebration of Grand Sorcerer
and Supreme Celebrant of His Ninth Birthday Ethan Wilson.
Prof. Severus Snape teaching Potions, Prof. Rubeus Hagrid teaching
Care of Magical Creatures, and Wand Making. Classes will begin at precisely 2 of the clock and will end promptly at 4.
Please R.S.V.P. by owl no later than 20 August 2011
(or use your muggle phone to call 801-404-2143)
Yours Sincerely,
Ashli Wilson
Deputy Headmistress
It's formatting weird here, but that's what it read with the hogwarts seal at the top.
Then we sealed them with red wax (crayon) and put a letter "H" stamp on it for Hogwarts
Then we drew owls on a white helium balloon to and attached one to each envelope to deliver. You can see in the top picture what it looked like altogether.
It was so fun to deliver each of them and see how excited the kids were about receiving it.
You can imagine our surprise when this afternoon after church our door bell rang and on our door step was this box with a scroll in it. It had apparently come by "owl" and informed us that they would be honored to attend etc. It was addressed to Grand Sorcerer Ethan. If you noticed in the invited they were told to RSVP by Owl or by "muggle" phone. Never in a million years would i have thought someone would be so clever with their response.
Needless to say we are getting all excited around here for the party. We have ordered our frog molds so we can make our chocolate frogs and will have botts beans and cauldron cakes and the like.
For a special gift on Ethan's actual birthday, Rand is taking Ethan and Anna into Manhattan to see the Harry Potter exhibit. They have real sets and all the actual costumes from the movies. We've heard from others that it's great. I think the kids will think it's awesome, in fact I wish I was going!
Palmyra Falls
Rand's parents came to visit recently and we all went to visit Palmyra NY, and Niagara Falls. The kids could not get that straight and we finally just started calling it "Palmyra Falls" just to cut down on the arguments and confusion.
Palmyra NY, is just a short 5 hour drive from here and yes a 5 hr drive for us anymore is just no big deal. We spend a lot of time in the car around here and have done several little road trips and the kids have done well. Although, I will say that very recently Jane is getting to that difficult and busy age where another road trip will not be on the calendar anytime soon.
We chose to go to Palmyra the week after the Hill Cumorah pageant had finished, to avoid the craziest time of year. While we have heard great things about the pageant itself, we have also heard horror stories about the crowds, the lack of hotel availability, mosquito's and a very late night at the pageant with crying kids. We've even had friends who went all the way to see the pageant and ended up leaving half way through because they and their children were so miserable.
Anywho, I was happy with our choice because all of the sites we visited were quiet and we basically had our own personal tour everywhere we went. The weather was absolutely perfect and of course it was special to see the sites where the beginning of our church all started. It was really special to walk in the same places that Joseph Smith walked and even touch some of the things he touched.
The Palmyra temple was beautiful and now sits on part of the Smith family property. One amazing feature of the Palmyra temple is that while usually all the windows of the temple are covered with beautiful stained glass, there was one window in the temple that is clear that gives a perfect view out over The Sacred Grove. It is amazing and even a little strange to see the temple just sitting out in the middle of nowhere.
We arrived in Palmyra in the afternoon the first day and went straight to the visitors center. One of the biggest reason's we went to visit was also to see Rand's mission president and Mom who are now serving their 5th, yes 5th mission there. The are an amazing couple and have been such positive examples to us throughout our marriage. We have seen them a handful of times over the years and we are grateful that Rand has such a close relationship with them. When Randall was in Albanian and the missionaries were evacuated (twice) there were times that Randall and his companion were the only missionaries actually in the mission and not allowed to proselyte so he spent a lot of one on one time with President and Sister Lenker. They spent a lot of time playing Scrabble and just talking so they know each other very well.
While the Lenkers finished up some business we took some time to climb up the Hill Cumorah to see the spot where it is believed that Joseph received the golden plates. It was a beautiful day with a beautiful view. The kids were more than happy to get out of the car and run a round a bit.
The kids with Grandpa and Grandma Wilson
The is the view from the top of the hill. The "squares" in the grass are where the people sat to see the pageant.
The is the first of the Smith's home. It was a very small log cabin that had 11 people living in it. It is not the original home but was rebuilt on the original site as far as they can tell.
This picture is looking out the back door of the home onto The Sacred Grove. Joseph Smith walked out that door to go and ask God, which of the church's was true. This view held the most significance for me and left me with a deeper impression than at any other time while we were there.
This was the upstairs room Where many of them slept and where Joseph was visited by the angel Moroni several times. The kids surprisingly loved to walk through these homes and Anna kept asking to go back to "Joseph's house" . I wondered if they would enjoy this trip at all and if they would get anything out of it, but Ethan and Anna seemed to both understand and enjoy it.
This is a view of the Palmyra temple down the lane from the Smith home.
This is the second Smith home that was built, and it was actually a very nice home. I was surprised. It made me not feel so bad about wanting a nice home of my own someday :)
This is the fireplace where Joseph at one time hid the plates from the mobs that were searching for them.
I love this picture of the kids running down the road from the grove. When we went into the grove we weren't expecting anything miraculous, but what we did experience were large swarms of bugs and flies. Needless to say we didn't last long.
The second day we drove two hours to Niagara Falls. I was looking forward to this, but it way exceeded my expectations. It was so amazing and so. much. fun.
We all rode "The Maid of the Mist", a boat that takes you as close to the falls as the current will allow. If you don't wear your poncho, and even if you do you can get very wet. It was amazing to be up so close to something so huge and amazing. The power the falls generated was awesome. The boat was reving it's engine so hard just to try to fight against the current. The pictures don't do the falls or the experience any justice but it was something I will never forget and would love to do again someday. If you ever go it's a must do.
The third day, we went E.B. Grandin's where the first Book of Mormon was published. The church now owns the site of course and it is a beautiful visitors center with the original brick and floors from when The Book of Mormon was first published. It was amazing to walk on the same floors that Joseph did and see the original ink spills on the floor. The kids were taught how the pages were printed, folded and cut. They even each made their own "signature" copy, the first 16 pages. Again we were the only ones on the tour. We then spent a little more time with the Lenkers before we filled our bellies and headed home.
Randall with President Lenker. He and his wife are both converts to the church. He was an LAPD motorcop and a tough dude. He was special ops in the Marines and has done some amazing stuff. One time in the marines he and some other marines were released from a submarine under the water and had to swim to the surface, from hundreds of feet below. I don't know how they did it. He still runs about 6 miles each morning and lifts weights and his wife walks an hour and a half each morning to keep trim and fit. See? Amazing people.
The trees in the far back of the picture are "The Grove"
This is the view from the temple, to what would have been still part of the Smith Family farm.
The kids with Grandpa and Grandma Saturday morning before they left for the airport.
We were glad that Rick and Shelley joined us on our little trip. We hope that while the kids may not remember everything they saw, or understand the significance that they will remember that it was important to us that we go and see where some of the most significant things happened in our church's history.
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