A New Resolution

New Year's Eve is usually the hardest day emotionally for me of the entire year. I always find myself looking back with regret that I didn't do everything I wanted or thought I should do. Always wishing I could change something etc. I feel down and depressed that I'm not thin enough, good enough, the list goes on and on. As I've given that some thought this year I really felt like all those feelings are just me feeling ingratitude. Instead I need to reflect on all the good things I've done, the many things that have been accomplished and not beat myself up that I wasn't perfect.

This year we have been immensely blessed. Some things at the top of the list are the birth of our sweet Jane. She is a happy and healthy baby, Randall's secure employment, our membership in our church, my parents getting through a very difficult trial this year, My parents health being sustained this year, a warm home, a car to drive, food on our table every single day and night and in between, something we definitely take for granted, a good relationship with my husband and children, wonderful friends who care about me and so much more. I am so incredibly blessed that tonight as I ring in the New year I want to focus on the blessings I've been given this year.

This year I make just one resolution. Allow me to explain.I've given some thought recently to how it's not fun to be around negative people. Being a detail oriented person like i am, it's very easy for me to notice everything, both good and bad. With that noticing it's easy to be overly critical or negative at times. I am realizing I can use that trait for the bad or see it as a great strength. This year instead of making a laundry list of things I think I need to change I am going to choose just one thing. That thing is to be positive. I think choosing to have a positive outlook on life can make every aspect of my life and those I associate with better.

Randall was recently talking to a friend and coworker of his who has a similar personality to mine. He also sees the details and can be overly critical. He told Randall that someone gave him the advice once to pretend as though everyone he saw had a sign taped to their forehead that read "Believe it or not, I'm doing my very best". I've given that a lot of thought, and already put that thought into practice and realize I am already a happier person. I think that was excellent advice. I think if more people would think that same way the world would be a happier place. With this in mind, I think it's going to be a pretty great year.

To read New year's post 2009 go here.
To read New Year post 2008 go here.

A VERY snowy surprise

Randall out shoveling for hours!
A wet scene I'm sure to see a lot of this winter.

Our back steps are now just sheets of ice. My Dad and Ethan enjoyed taking a hammer to all that ice!
Poor Ethan was out helping Randall for an hour or so and when he came in he had these strange patches of weird skin...I don't know if it was frostbite, or windburn. It was the strangest thing I've ever seen. The skin was kind of tough and hard, and swollen feeling.
Now we know why they put those "poles" around the fire hydrants...
Enough snow?


A house across the street. With the wind the snow drifted to almost cover all their steps and half their windows.
Our front porch. There was about 3 feet of drifted snow. We just kept saying "unbelievable" over and over. Even living in Michigan 3 years this was crazy.
In the morning this is how we found our van.

In the evening of the storm.
Below: The snow was covering half our window, this was after we had actually hit the screen trying to uncover the window.

As of Christmas day we hadn't received more than a fluttering of snowflakes on one occasion. We thought a white Christmas would be nice but we weren't so lucky. The next day however, was a whole other story. We woke up to a forecast of snow, but by the time we went to church at 10am no snow. by the time we left church it had started to snow and we had probably an inch on the ground and everyone was very excited. It was only after it continued to snow and blow like crazy for hour after hour that we started to think this was a serious storm. That night my parents tried to get back to their hotel, but after several attempts, we realized they were snowed. They had to spend the night on some air mattresses in our living room. Whoops. I told them they were the lucky ones that got to sleep around the Christmas tree.

In the end we received 30 inches in 12 hrs! Now is that a lot of snow, but with all the blowing the drifts in some places were almost 5 feet high. The biggest bummer of all of this snow was that we had forked out some sweet cash to join my parents to see the "Rockettes Christmas Spectacular" on Monday. The transit authorities advised everyone to stay in and truthfully there was no way we could even get out to get a sitter and get into the city. We were really sad but it was out of our control. Randall and our Landlord and his wife shoveled for 3 hrs just to get the cars out and a path out the drive and from the front door. It was kind of fun but it is proving to make the already narrow roads in many places now one lane. Just one more charming thing we about New Jersey. You gotta love it or you just may cry yourself to sleep at night!

Christmas Day

The kids waiting patiently for Daddy and Jane








We had a great Christmas. Between us, my parents and my in-laws, the kids were thrilled. We had a great time opening all the gifts. Then we had a great breakfast of baked French toast and buttermilk syrup. It's always about the food with us. Then the best part is that we just lounged around and did whatever we wanted. Watched some movies. Played some games. In years past the routine was to hurry and get up and unwrap then hurry to get ready and then hurry to get to somebody's house then the next and so on. This year it was nice to just hunker in and enjoy the day. We missed the family that we didn't see but talked, texted and video chatted. Thank heavens for modern technology!

Christmas Eve

Mixing up Sugar cookies for Santa.
Our candle light dinner. A tradition of ours. The kids love that we get to have candles.

Christmas Jammies!

Jane with Papa

Below: Setting up for Christmas morning while wathching a little "Home Alone".

Christmas Eve was mostly a day of preparation and cooking. That morning we just kind of took things easy and in the afternoon we made dinner. Last year we finally got smart and set the table for a really nice dinner with tablecloth and Christmas dishes but ordered in Cafe Rio Pork Salads. It was awesome. There was no prep or clean up and yet it was still a nice and tasty meal. This year we thought we would replicate last year only there isn't a cafe Rio. In fact, we have yet to find any good mexican. Taco bell would be looking good about right now. Anyway we found various recipies on line for the pork, the rice, beans and salad dressing. I have to say the salads turned out awesome and we were in heaven.

Before dinner we delivered some gifts to some member of our ward and then drove surrounding neighborhoods to see the luminaries. It was fun to see the Christmas decorations and luminaries around town. People here decorate differently than in Utah. It is pretty low key and what is mostly seen is candles in the windows and wreaths and boughs. That's it. NO lights on the eve's of the houses or anything. I actually really like it. There is something that says Christmas to me about seeing an entire neighborhood in Utah with all the housetops all lit up, but I also really found it maybe old fashioned and charming the way it is done here. Just very traditional.

After our driving around we had dinner and then sang some peppy Christmas tunes then I played a little calmer Christmas music on the piano to calm things down. Then we read Luke 2 and sang some more reverent and applicable songs like "Away in a Manger" and "Silent night". The kids were still pretty wound up so we let them watch the old school version of "The Grinch who stole Christmas."

Ethan was actually asleep before we even turned on the movie. The girls on the other hand were for sure not ready for bed. Soon after that my parents went back to their hotel and we got things set up for Santa to come. Thankfully this year I had everything all wrapped, so we just had to set the scene if you will for Christmas morning. We actually went to bed at 10pm which has to be some sort of record. I went to sleep immediately. 7 months of sleep deprivation can't be cured with 3 good nights sleep. Thankfully Jane slept through the night so that was the best gift ever!

Anna's Art

It's so fun to see how much progress the kids are making in school. At the beginning of the year Anna was still drawing people by just drawing a circle and drawing 4 lines out of the head for arms and legs. No body, no clothes, and scraggly hair on the sides of the head regardless of whether it was a boy or girl. Her "art" was always so "abstract" shall we say that I almost never knew what it was. Little by little she is doing better and better.

For homework the other day we was asked to draw and label things begging with the letter "D". Her first thing was Dad and this is was she drew. Not only does it show a lot of progress but for some reason I think it is one of the very cutest drawings I have ever seen. It has earned a spot on our fridge and it makes me smile every time I look at it.

Christmas Adam

On Thurs, Christmas Adam, our kids actually had half day school! Can you believe that? After the kids got out of school we, went to the mall to do a little shopping, and see Santa Claus! The kids had actually seen Santa on a number of occasions but had never asked to actually talk to him. I thought it would be fun though and wanted to have a picture with Jane and Santa for her first Christmas. The mall was actually surprisingly not too busy, other than the food court, and we got some good shopping done with Christmas money.

My parents had flown in the day before so it was really fun to have them here with us to participate in some of these holiday traditions.

We stood in line thankfully not very long to see the big guy. All our kids still believe in Santa and I think that's really fun. Ethan asked us a few more questions about him this year, but honestly I would like him to believe as long as possible. I still remember when I found out about Santa. The kids at school had been talking of course and I came home and asked my Mom if her was "real". I was just sure she would say something like "of course"! I don't remember what she said exactly but I just remember feeling devastated at the news. I think there are just so few things in life that are completely fun and magical that I'm going to just go with it as long as we can.

Christmas Sunday

I think this is honestly the first time ever that we have had all 4 kids looking forward and smiling at the same time!

Even though Ethan and Jane aren't looking forward, I think this is so cute. Jane just suddenly looked up at Ethan and I got the shot. So sweet.

On Sunday before Christmas I always try to have the kids look nice and Christmas-y. I was pretty impressed with myself because I had to be to church by 8:30 that morning to have a last choir rehearsal. So to have everyone up, bathed, dressed and ready by 8:15 was pretty darn amazing. Someone was picking me up and called to say they were running 5 minutes behind so of course I thought it would be the perfect time(ya right) to try to gather everyone for the perfect picture. I think we did pretty well. Too bad we had already sent out our Christmas cards, one of these could have made for a good picture. Oh well I was thrilled to have the kids looking so cute and sweet for 5 minutes. Of course by the time they walked in with Randall to church an hour and half later they didn't look quite so put together, hair pulled out, flowers missing, but it was good while it lasted!

Credit where due

On day 7 of Randall being gone on his business trip I got a knock on the door. On my porch was what looked like a big box for flowers to be delivered. I was shocked. I even checked to make sure they had the right address. I brought them in the kitchen and opened the box to find these beautiful flowers. I couldn't find a card at first so I still wasn't sure they were from Randall. It's not that I thought they were from a secret admirer or anything, it's just that Randall is a wonderful husband but surprises, and flowers are just not really his "thing". I finally found a card and sure enough they were from Randall just telling me how much he appreciated all I was doing while he was away. It made my day to be sure! I was so excited, and he was just excited that he finally had pulled off a great surprise. It almost made it worth his being gone....almost, but not quite :)

Christmas...

I can just feel myself getting fatter...awesome! January can't come fast enough.

He's on his way!

No, not Santa, but Randall is about to get on a plane to come home for Christmas. The last 8 days have thankfully gone by quickly and we have survived.

We had one really hard night where Jane just would not stop crying so 3 and half hours later I called my home teacher in tears to ask him to give her a blessing. He was very kind and promptly came in his White shirt at 11pm no less, and gave her a blessing of comfort. The last time he came to visit he said he wanted to make sure he had my phone number in his phone and that he would pick up day or night. It was very comforting when he answered quickly and said "Hey Ashli what's up?" He didn't act in any way annoyed or put out. He even invited us over the next night, but since he works so late, as most men do around here, I told him my children would be in bed but that it was really kind of him to offer. The next day his wife, whom I've really never ever talked to called to ask what she could do for me. She even offered to come watch the girls so I could take a nap. When I refused she said she would be by later that night to bring a treat, and she came as promised. While I am tired, and have certainly felt some lonliness with Randall gone I was grateful for this little challenge because it helped remind me that my Heavenly Father is aware of me, and when in need he will send angels to help me.

A cold with...

Anna just suddenly and very seriously said "I have a cold with nipples". I think she meant sniffles. I'm still laughing and Ethan's asking me what's so funny. :)

Funny commentary

Last night we did a movie night, great idea Katrina, and we watch the Disney's "A Christmas Carol" It was actually pretty scary and I ended up forwarding though several parts. But... when Scrooge goes to see the last ghost he enters a big beautiful room and Ethan turns and says "Wow, he's a nice ghost and a pretty good decorator too, I can tell!" I laughed so hard, that kid is such a crack up!

Vegas Baby!

This morning Randall called a taxi to go to the airport and a big black SUV showed up in front of our place. I wasn't sure if it was the royal treatment or if he was being expedited to another country!

That's right Rand has left and is on his way to Vegas...for 8 days. Now I realize that some woman are single mothers for years and years, and some woman's husbands travel constantly but I can still give myself permission to be a little bit sad. I guess it's good news that I really like my husband!

I think the reason this trip bothers me more than other trips he's been on is because it's 8 days in what I think is the height of the Christmas season. That and now that he is gone I really do feel kind of all alone here.

I know it's dumb but now I'm feeling stressed. I somehow feel like I need to make the next 8 days absolutely fantastic. Filled with fun activities, treats and movies galore. Maybe it's for me to help pass the time. Maybe I'm feeling like by the time he gets back my parents will practically be on their way and then Christmas will come and go and suddenly before I can blink, it will all be over. The holidays I mean. And let's face it, I'm not alone in saying I definitely suffer from the post holiday blues. In fact New years Eve is often my most down day of the year. So now with just 15 days left until Christmas it's crunch time and all that keeping it simple has been great but I'm feeling the panic to make sure that this Christmas is a memorable one. Not just for my kids but for my parents too. It's so sweet of them to be with just us this year. Now is the year to have our own Christmas Eve and Christmas with new traditions. Except now that the possibilities are endless it's all feeling a tad overwhelming.

Ok, I need to just take a deep breath and count to ten. The next 8 days are going to be awesome!

Oh yes I did

Today it was suddenly time to take Anna to school and I was still in my sweaty workout clothes, hair in a ponytail and looking mighty fine. I looked in the basket downstairs where we keep some of our shoes and the only pair to be found were some high heeled black boots. After a rough night and about 3 hours of sleep, I was too tired to go upstairs, so just threw them on. I thought they complimented my faded black capri pants nicely. When Anna saw me she said, "you can't wear those!" I said "oh yes I can", and... I did. The whole way to school she kept telling me not to tell or show her teacher. I only drop her at the curb where an teacher takes her inside so I knew nobody would see my sweet get-up. I threatened a few times just for fun to tell Anna's teacher about my boots and she kept begging me not to.

Such a silly thing but I laughed to myself all the way to school and back. I needed that. I just may wear these boots tomorrow.

Ginger a nogo

Last night we made our traditional Ginger bread house. By that I mean that I bought a kit at Costco and the kids decorated it. Truthfully I was a tad disappointed this year. Not in the kids but in the Costco kit. Normally there are quite a few candies and this year there were like 3 little things. And the house was made incorrectly so that the side lining up were incorrect. Oh well. I thought about going out and buying more candy and really going all out, but I just wasn't in the mood and figured the kids would just eat all the candy anyway, right? So I just totally let the kids do it all on their own. Well, I did glue the houses together first with my trusty glue gun because that's just smart in my opinion because otherwise you just get going and the house looks great and then it falls apart.

The kids had a good time until at the last minute Ethan suddenly added a little something and then had a fit because "now Anna's looks better than mine. Mine looks like a preschooler did it!" Truth be told Anna's did look pretty good. He got over in a fairly short period of time.

Now to the "gogo" portion of the title. The kids kept asking me all day when they were going to eat it. For some reason I got tired of them asking and really didn't have anywhere to display their little homes so I said, fine go eat it. Away they went eating to their little hearts content. Then a little bit later I offered to drop them out the window like my sis in law did a few years back. They weren't too keen on that idea (I was seriously excited about the prospect) so in the garbage they "goed". Been there, done that, checked off the list.

Next year my heart might be a little more into it.

Proud parents

Today is "Fast Sunday", and Since Ethan is now an actual member of our church, we thought we would ask him if he would like to fast today. At first he said "no" and we said that was fine. We talked to him about some of the blessings we receive when we fast and why it's a good thing to do. We are big in our family on letting our kids make their own choices and not forcing them to do things. Along that same line we also until now have let Ethan decide whether or not he paid tithing on money he earned or was given. Naturally he didn't really want to pay tithing, so he didn't. But...as he was preparing for baptism we reminded him of some of the things we are asked to do as members of the church and one is to pay tithing. We told him that if he was going to be baptized he needed to then be prepared to pay a tithe. He agreed, but since his baptism is having a hard time wanting to pay his tithing.

After more discussion and realizing one of the biggest reason he didn't want to fast was because he didn't know how to pray to start his fast, he chose to fast. At first he said he just wanted to fast until right before church at 10am. We told him that was a great! Then when that time came he decided he would fast until after church. We thought that was awesome. He was a little whiny this morning saying he was hungry and we explained that it's best to fast with a happy attitude and he did well after that.

Today in church I passed him the sacrament and he whispered, "no thanks, I'm fasting". I was so impressed. Most people wouldn't even think of that or just out of habit would take the bread and water, but he wanted to fast completely without eating. I quickly explained that he could take the sacrament. He did great all through church and lasted until 1:30. Not bad for not wanting to fast in the first place. I'm especially impressed because fasting is one of the hardest things for me to do. I hate to go hungry and more importantly I often get low blood sugar and then feel awful or get super duper ornery which makes me get angry and kind of defeats the purpose of the fast. In our early years of marriage it would make for such an awful day that once Randall kindly suggested that Maybe I shouldn't fast any more :)

Also a neat thing happened. His primary teacher is a 19 year old covert to the church. She is leaving in January to start school at BYU Idaho. Today she stood to bear her testimony of tithing and told a story about how she wrecked her car and had to use all her school savings to fix the car. She continued to pay her tithing and ended up getting a full scholarship to school so now doesn't have to pay anything out of pocket. A direct blessings she felt for paying her tithing. I thought it was so great that Ethan's very own teacher stood to bear testimony of the exact thing he was trying to gain a testimony of. Ethan is a very sweet boy and we are proud of him for the good decisions he's making.

On another note, we recently had stake conference and the apostle Elder Christofferson came. We thought that was pretty amazing that he would come. The drive to the conference was 30 minutes or more so the kids watched "Joy to the World" on the way. While watching Ethan became upset saying it wasn't fair that those people got to meet Jesus and asked why couldn't he meet Jesus? It was pretty cute. Elder Christofferson was the closing speaker and asked that at the end of the meeting if the children would come and shake hands with him. After the conference ended all the children patiently lined up to meet him. Elder Christofferson shook hands with each one and asked them their name. Ethan came up to me right after he had met him and said "Now that was cool!"

Give me some suga

Yesterday I was putting some groceries away when I turned around to see Kate in the little cupboard where I keep my baking supplies. When I looked a little closer I could see she was snacking on some brown sugar. When I asked her about it she said "I wasn't eating it Mom, I was looking at it!" At least she has good taste :)

Christmas Letter 2010

For posterity's sake I am posting below a copy of our Christmas letter that I am sending out with our Christmas cards. I only send cards out to family and friends that we don't keep in touch with much. Or that send cards to us hint, hint hint...

Here it goes:

Dear Friends and Family,

If we had to describe our year it would be busy, but blessed. Our biggest blessing arrived April 21^st as a sweet little bundle we named Jane Elizabeth. Yes, that makes 4 kids if you've lost count.

The next biggest change came August 4^th when we packed up our not so little family and moved to New Jersey! Randall is still working for Adobe, and when an opportunity came for a change, we decided it was too good to pass up. Randall currently works at home a few days a week, and then commutes via train to Midtown Manhattan the other days of the week. The commute for him is about 55 minutes door to door. He is really enjoying the change in scenery as well as the new job responsibilities. Moving East into a very fast paced and somewhat complicated place was an adjustment for us, but with 4 months now under our belt we are feeling quite settled. We are doing our best to take advantage of all there is to see and experience here.

Ethan turned 8 this year and is in second grade. He was baptized a member of our church in October when both sets of grandparents were able to come for the weekend. He is enjoying school and making lots of friends, something he does very well. Ethan is a lot of fun, and if you ever want to have an in depth conversation, he's the one to call.

Anna turned 6 in October. Her two biggest joys are dancing (so far just in the living room) and baby Jane. She is in half day kindergarten and absolutely loves school. She has a great teacher and is doing well.

Katherine(Kate) turned 3 in August and is our spunky child. She loves to play with Anna, bake with Mom in the kitchen, and anything that has to do with Hello Kitty.

Jane is now 7 months. Her recent accomplishments are sitting up on her own, waving goodbye and saying Mama. She is a very sweet and happy baby.

Ashli stays busy taking kids to and from school and their various activities. She enjoys “blogging” as a way to document the day to day of our life. In a spare moment she is found either reading a book, playing the piano, or baking a treat. She loves the charm of the East coast and the various things there are to do and see.

During this holiday season, we think of our many blessings. We are grateful for the friends that have come into our lives over the years. We are also grateful at this time to reflect and remember our Savior Jesus Christ and His birth and life that we celebrate. Wishing you all a very Merry Christmas!

Love, Randall, Ashli, Ethan, Anna, Kate, and Jane